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Community Corner

Notes from Youville: Friends are Good For Your Health

Wherever you are, it is your friends who make up your world.”  

William James 

While our social instincts may become less intense as we age, the benefits we derive from friendship become greater.  In various studies, seniors with active friendships have been shown to live longer than those without close friends. Friends provide us with increased self-confidence and a sense of belonging.  At the same time, friends expand our perspectives and make our lives bigger.  Researchers believe that these mental and emotional benefits, unique to friendship, translate to better health in older age.

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An extensive study on friendship took place in South Australia, tracking more than fifteen hundred seniors over a period of ten years. Researchers at Flinders University found that those seniors with significant friendships in their lives were twenty-two percent more likely to live longer than those without close friends. Family ties appeared to have no effect on the survival rates of the participants -- seniors without family still lived longer if they had close friends in their lives.

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Although the researchers could not say for sure why having friends increased survival rates, they guessed that the reason had to do with reduced stress. The feeling of connection with others is a natural stress reducer; low stress in turn has a positive effect on the immune system, blood pressure and heart health.

 

Friends may also help ward off dementia.  When we socialize we make judgments, form memories, and forge new neural connections.  This benefit of “mental exercise” is what leads many to consider moving into senior living communities.  An article published in AARP, aptly titled “Friends Make You Smart,” focused on Stella, an eighty-six year old who had begun to withdraw into herself following the death of her husband.  In addition to becoming withdrawn, she was also becoming forgetful, skipping meals and often unsure what day it was.   That trend was dramatically reversed when Stella’s daughter convinced her to move into a nearby assisted living community.  According to the article, “Within a month she was applying blush and wearing jewelry. She started playing bridge every week and walking three miles a day.”

 

Stella’s experience is one of the most common success stories associated with assisted living.

For Stella and others like her, a social environment makes all the difference.

             

Obstacles to Making Friends

Socialization can have its challenges in later life. Those living with reduced mobility, chronic pain or other health conditions might feel that attending a social event is too much trouble.  Hearing loss is one of the most common and undertreated obstacles, affecting our ability to take part in conversations and often leading to our withdrawal from social situations.  In many cases, social obstacles can be reduced by addressing hearing loss or other health problems with a doctor. 

 

How many friends should you have?

Some of us are comfortable with a small number of very close friends; others prefer to maintain a larger sphere of connections. The Mayo Clinic suggests that you should pick the number and quality of friends that works best for you. The most important thing is to keep socially active and try to stay in touch with people outside of your immediate family. Whether you are a social butterfly, or more comfortable with a smaller circle of close confidantes, the friendships you nurture today are likely to lead to a longer life.

 

A community environment offers the advantage of living among one’s peers and fosters a more social lifestyle.  Here are a few tips for making new friends and nurturing the friendships you already have:

 

• Accept invitations – when you are invited to an event, go to it!

 

• Show an interest in others and maintain a friendly attitude.

 

• Adopt a positive, healthy self-image. Try to avoid excessive complaining. Positive energy is a magnet for others who are interested in expanding their friendships.

 

• Volunteering for a cause you care about is a great way to meet people in your community with similar interests.

 

• Join a faith community. Being around people who share your personal beliefs and values is a great way to connect with potential friends.

 

All through life, friends play an essential role in our well-being. Whatever your age, maintaining an active social life may be one of the healthiest choices you can make.

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